I totally took my hearing for granted. It’s something I’ve always had, and truly valued when it came to music. Having a “good ear” means being able to hear pitch and intonation and just know if it’s right. And hey, it doesn’t hurt to be able to hear my kids (except when they fight) and husband. And the world around me. So yeah, I’m that girl who totally blew through life not giving a thought to my hearing. Until 2 weeks ago that is.
And now—my left ear has slipped from normal to moderate range, and I don’t know if I will get it back. And that scares the crap out of me. I have had 2 steroid injections into my inner ear and await a third today. (I must be desperate to get well if I willingly subject myself to shots in the ear!) Supposedly, a virus has caused this problem in my inner ear that originally seemed like an ear infection. I only wish it had been. I opted for the shots instead of taking an oral steroid because of the side effects and although it is a bit painful and uncomfortable to lay there for 20 minutes without swallowing, I am desperate to fix the ear and it seemed to be the more localized solution. There was an improvement between shot 1 and 2 in my hearing test, but over the weekend, I think things took a turn for the worse. I can hardly hear out of my left ear from the humming.
I don’t write this because I am throwing a pity party (even though I am super bummed and emotional about this). I have to write about it to get rid of it. I’ve prayed. I’ve told more people about it than I normally ever would (I hate sharing medical stuff) in the hope that having others pray will help. But my impatience is letting doubt creep in, and then worry and stress. I can’t go down that road.
I am finding out that several people in my family have had tinnitus, including my great grandmother and my dad. This may be the new normal. It sucks. I joked with Clay that my blog title may have to change from “Music 2 My Ears” to “Music 2 My Ear”. I had to joke about it because I was just tired of crying.
Mainly I just needed to share it and wanted you to hear about it (ironic don’t ya think) and please keep me in your prayers and thoughts. Thank you ever so much-